manic

When one spends a lot of time alone, one’s mind could become vivid. Pleasurable or painful emotions could take over when there’s no one around to interrupt reverie. Of course, one might bump into something, or get careless. This could bring one back to earth, out of the clouds, out of daydream or stupor.

            Most of the time Lohbado is alone. He’s part of a club of lonely people. It’s maybe the new normal, social isolation. Get used to it. We're all in it together. Nobody has it easy. Everybody is lonely, so quit complaining. That's the message, for sure. 

Humans are emotional creatures with a huge irrational subconscious mind. When people get together, there's bound to be disagreement, irritation, anger, desire, a whole spectrum of strong emotion. Sometimes when with troubled, unstable or highly opinionated individuals, one has to endure rude aggressive talk. It's unpleasant when someone vomits a torrent of psychotic gibberish. Or even worse, Lohbado could start talking like a maniac. Lohbado has caught himself in the act of being hyper, too intense, way over the top. A few times Lohbado was out of control. People looked at him like, what's this guy's problem? Ah, we're biological creatures. It could be chemicals, hormones, neurons firing... determinism, cause and effect. Let the one without sin cast the first stone. Don't criticize, lest you be criticized. 

There must be at least a billion lonely isolated people. It’s a paradox. In a world of over 7 billion people and while living in a large city, it’s possible to go for days without any conversation or human interaction, other than a superficial exchange at a grocery store or waving to the neighbours.

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Lohbado’s approach: treat social isolation as a research project. What’s it like to spend so much time alone? Solitude allows one to calm down. The mind could eventually settle down. Taken to an extreme, solitude could get intense. One yearns for company. Sometimes it feels like the world is a huge movie. One sits in the dark and watches people come and go, but is unable to interact with them. Sometimes it made Lohbado want to scream. Is this for real? Is this really happening? Am I awake or dreaming?